New Year, New Attitude

New Year's Resolutions - I make them every year, only to make the same ones when the next year rolls around! This year, I have decided not to make any New Year's Resolutions, but instead I am going to focus on things that I should STOP doing to myself. My usual resolutions, like losing weight, being more financially stable, and eating healthier, will all come to be reality if I can focus on the things that continue to sabotage my well being. Thank you Allison for posting this on Facebook, it was a reminder of just how hard we can be on ourselves. Remember to keep the glass half full. Think of all the good things we all have to offer and make 2012 the year we look at ourselves the way others see us rather than the way we see ourselves. We ARE good enough and we ARE more important than we realize! I'm am focusing on #22, Stop overlooking  the beauty of small moments. These small moments usually turn out to be pretty big ones and sometimes I have to remind myself of that! If I can focus on even a few of these things, I know my life would become a lot better :)

30 Things to Stop Doing to Yourself

1. Stop spending time with the wrong people. – Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you.  If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you.  You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot.  Never, ever insist yourself to someone who continuously overlooks your worth.  And remember, it’s not the people that stand by your side when you’re at your best, but the ones who stand beside you when you’re at your worst that are your true friends.

2. Stop running from your problems. – Face them head on.  No, it won’t be easy.  There is no person in the world capable of flawlessly handling every punch thrown at them.  We aren’t supposed to be able to instantly solve problems.  That’s not how we’re made.  In fact, we’re made to get upset, sad, hurt, stumble and fall.  Because that’s the whole purpose of living – to face problems, learn, adapt, and solve them over the course of time.  This is what ultimately molds us into the person we become.

3. Stop lying to yourself. – You can lie to anyone else in the world, but you can’t lie to yourself.  Our lives improve only when we take chances, and the first and most difficult chance we can take is to be honest with ourselves.  Read The Road Less Traveled.

4. Stop putting your own needs on the back burner. – The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too.  Yes, help others; but help yourself too.  If there was ever a moment to follow your passion and do something that matters to you, that moment is now.

5. Stop trying to be someone you’re not. – One of the greatest challenges in life is being yourself in a world that’s trying to make you like everyone else.  Someone will always be prettier, someone will always be smarter, someone will always be younger, but they will never be you.  Don’t change so people will like you.  Be yourself and the right people will love the real you.

6. Stop trying to hold onto the past. – You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading your last one.

7. Stop being scared to make a mistake. – Doing something and getting it wrong is at least ten times more productive than doing nothing.  Every success has a trail of failures behind it, and every failure is leading towards success.  You end up regretting the things you did NOT do far more than the things you did.

8. Stop berating yourself for old mistakes. – We may love the wrong person and cry about the wrong things, but no matter how things go wrong, one thing is for sure, mistakes help us find the person and things that are right for us.  We all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past.  But you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future.  Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.

9. Stop trying to buy happiness. – Many of the things we desire are expensive.  But the truth is, the things that really satisfy us are totally free – love, laughter and working on our passions.

10. Stop exclusively looking to others for happiness. – If you’re not happy with who you are on the inside, you won’t be happy in a long-term relationship with anyone else either.  You have to create stability in your own life first before you can share it with someone else.  Read Stumbling on Happiness.

11. Stop being idle. – Don’t think too much or you’ll create a problem that wasn’t even there in the first place.  Evaluate situations and take decisive action.  You cannot change what you refuse to confront.  Making progress involves risk.  Period!  You can’t make it to second base with your foot on first.

12. Stop thinking you’re not ready. – Nobody ever feels 100% ready when an opportunity arises.  Because most great opportunities in life force us to grow beyond our comfort zones, which means we won’t feel totally comfortable at first.

13. Stop getting involved in relationships for the wrong reasons. – Relationships must be chosen wisely.  It’s better to be alone than to be in bad company.  There’s no need to rush.  If something is meant to be, it will happen – in the right time, with the right person, and for the best reason. Fall in love when you’re ready, not when you’re lonely.

14. Stop rejecting new relationships just because old ones didn’t work. – In life you’ll realize that there is a purpose for everyone you meet.  Some will test you, some will use you and some will teach you.  But most importantly, some will bring out the best in you.

15. Stop trying to compete against everyone else. – Don’t worry about what others doing better than you.  Concentrate on beating your own records every day.  Success is a battle between YOU and YOURSELF only.

16. Stop being jealous of others. – Jealousy is the art of counting someone else’s blessings instead of your own.  Ask yourself this:  “What’s something I have that everyone wants?”

17. Stop complaining and feeling sorry for yourself. – Life’s curve balls are thrown for a reason – to shift your path in a direction that is meant for you.  You may not see or understand everything the moment it happens, and it may be tough.  But reflect back on those negative curveballs thrown at you in the past.  You’ll often see that eventually they led you to a better place, person, state of mind, or situation.  So smile!  Let everyone know that today you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday, and you will be.

18. Stop holding grudges. – Don’t live your life with hate in your heart.  You will end up hurting yourself more than the people you hate.  Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.”  It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.”  Forgiveness is the answer… let go, find peace, liberate yourself!  And remember, forgiveness is not just for other people, it’s for you too.  If you must, forgive yourself, move on and try to do better next time.

19. Stop letting others bring you down to their level. – Refuse to lower your standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise theirs. 

20. Stop wasting time explaining yourself to others. – Your friends don’t need it and your enemies won’t believe it anyway.  Just do what you know in your heart is right.

21. Stop doing the same things over and over without taking a break. – The time to take a deep breath is when you don’t have time for it.  If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting.  Sometimes you need to distance yourself to see things clearly.

22. Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments. – Enjoy the little things, because one day you may look back and discover they were the big things.  The best portion of your life will be the small, nameless moments you spend smiling with someone who matters to you.

23. Stop trying to make things perfect. – The real world doesn’t reward perfectionists, it rewards people who get things done.  Read Getting Things Done.

24. Stop following the path of least resistance. – Life is not easy, especially when you plan on achieving something worthwhile.  Don’t take the easy way out.  Do something extraordinary.

25. Stop acting like everything is fine if it isn’t. – It’s okay to fall apart for a little while.  You don’t always have to pretend to be strong, and there is no need to constantly prove that everything is going well. 
You shouldn’t be concerned with what other people are thinking either – cry if you need to – it’s healthy to shed your tears.  The sooner you do, the sooner you will be able to smile again.

26. Stop blaming others for your troubles. – The extent to which you can achieve your dreams depends on the extent to which you take responsibility for your life.  When you blame others for what you’re going through, you deny responsibility – you give others power over that part of your life.

27. Stop trying to be everything to everyone. – Doing so is impossible, and trying will only burn you out.  But making one person smile CAN change the world.  Maybe not the whole world, but their world.  So narrow your focus.

28. Stop worrying so much. – Worry will not strip tomorrow of its burdens, it will strip today of its joy.  One way to check if something is worth mulling over is to ask yourself this question: “Will this matter in one year’s time?  Three years?  Five years?”  If not, then it’s not worth worrying about.

29. Stop focusing on what you don’t want to happen. – Focus on what you do want to happen.  Positive thinking is at the forefront of every great success story.  If you awake every morning with the thought that something wonderful will happen in your life today, and you pay close attention, you’ll often find that you’re right. 

30. Stop being ungrateful. – No matter how good or bad you have it, wake up each day thankful for your life.  Someone somewhere else is desperately fighting for theirs.  Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else is missing.

HAPPY NEW YEAR'S!

Let's make this the best one yet!

The Jar

Another Christmas has come and gone. So much importance these days is put on buying things and spending a lot of money on frivolous gifts. My favourite gift this year, was one that came from the heart. It was a gift from Kelsie, a jar, all decorated with ribbons and stars, and Kelsie's signature decorations...googly eyes! In the jar, are little pieces of paper all folded up with inspirational quotes and sayings on them. I want to share these with you all, and really think about them as you read them and how the meaning of the quote is reflected in your own life:  

~ Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them - that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.

~ Never regret anything, because at one time it was exactly what you wanted.

~ I believe everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so that you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.

~ Only when we are no longer afraid do we begin to live.

~ Imperfection is beauty; madness is genius; and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.

~ How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.

~ Sometimes life isn't about the end. It's not always about tomorrow and the day after that, what we achieve over the years and how we leave the world. Sometimes it's about today. Any of us could die tomorrow regardless of the horde. We could get sick or be injured or anything else. That's the risk we take waking up each morning and stepping outside.

~ Everyone faces challenges in life. It's a matter of how you learn to overcome them and using them to your advantage.

~ You are good enough.

~ In the middle of every difficulty lies opportunity.

~ The only person who never makes mistakes is the person who never does anything.

~ You must realize, knowing everything won't do you a bit of good unless you use it to put beauty in this world.

~ Life is what you make it. No matter what, you're going to mess up sometimes, it's a universal truth. But the good part is, you get to decide how you are going to mess it up. Girls will be your friends - they'll act like it anyway. But just remember, some come, some go. They ones that stay with you through everything - they're your true best friends. Don't let go of them. Also remember, sisters make the best friends in the world. Just because you fail once, doesn't mean you're gonna fail at everything. Keep trying, hold on, and always, always, always believe in yourself, because if you don't, then who will? So keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life is a beautiful thing and there's so much to smile about.

~ Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish on it's ability to climb a tree, it will live it's whole life believing that it is stupid.

~ People should be able to say how they feel - how they really feel - not, you know, some words that some strangers put in their mouths.

~ Every moment you get is a gift. Spend it on things that matter. Don't spend it by dwelling on unhappy things.

~ There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.

~ Love is the answer, at least for most of the questions in my heart.

~ Even on a cloudy day, I'll keep my eyes fixed on the sun.

~ Every little thing is going to be alright,

~ Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive that is youer than you!

~ Even the best fall down sometimes.

~ You were born an original. Don't die a copy.

~ Just be yourself, you are wonderful.

~ I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all, I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.

~ Next time you think of beautiful things, don't forget to count yourself in.

~ You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life.

~ You are more important than you realize.

~ Be the change you wish to see in the world.

~ If we could see the miracle of a single flower clearly, our whole life would change.

~ Don't worry, be happy.

~ Always act like you're wearing an invisible crown.

~ Fuck everything. Beer time? :)

~ You are loved.

Never under estimate the meaning of a gift made from the heart. They are the ones that you will always remember. I know this has inspired me to be more creative in gift giving. I will be opening my mind more and my wallet less, and hopefully you will be inspired to do the same :)

Christmas

Christmas....the time of year when we all run around like mad men trying to buy the "perfect" gift. My question is, is there really ever a perfect gift? It's hard to find a perfect gift for people when you are always looking in the wrong place for it...the local Walmart. The perfect gift isn't something that dies when the batteries run out, or is replaced when a newer, faster version comes on the market. The perfect gift doesn't come from a box or bag or from a fancy store. There really is no "perfect" gift that you can buy. Too many people people under estimate the value of their time. Time spent with families and friends is invaluable to those that receive it. Christmas for me is not about what I am getting but rather, who I am going to be spending the time with. I am so excited to have Kelsie come down and spend Christmas with Darren and I. Having her here will bring lots of love, laughter and really good times. It's going to be FUN! People now a days are too busy finding the perfect gift that they forget what the season is all about..FUN! And I am looking forward to Christmas Day with Darren's family over for dinner and Boxing Day when we will be with my family for a Christmas brunch. So, it's not about the gifts but instead being with those you love. So Christmas for me will include family, food, booze (pina coladas) and memories. Shouldn't yours be the same?

I just want to wish all my family and friends a very Merry Christmas and a wonderful New Year!

Angels Among Us...

I just want to take a brief moment to remember someone special, my brother-in-law Bob. The reason I am remebering him now is that on Thursday, December 8th, he will have been gone for a year. December 8th also happens to be my birthday. It was forever changed last year when Bob was taken from us. I do feel that he is in a better place and finally feels like his old self again. He struggled for a long time with his health and it finally got the better of him. Not a day goes by that I don't think of my sister Mitch, and how she must be missing him. She is one of the strongest and most generous people I know and I envy that about her. So on Thursday, when everyone will be wishing me a Happy Birthday, I will be thinking of Mitch, and how I wish that there was some way I could bring Bob back...there truely are angels among us...Cheers to a great guy :)

Never Be Afraid To Say What You Feel

So many times I wish I would have had the courage to speak my mind. I'm the type of person that avoids confrontation if at all possible. I avoid talking about something because I am afraid of the reaction that I will get or the argument I might start. Sometimes I think the lack of courage and the inability to speak up, has caused me to be resentful, angry and even distant from people I love or have loved in the past. I am afraid to hurt people so I don't say anything when something is bothering me. As a result, I am the one who is angry and resentful, whereas the situation could have been resolved by talking about it and the anger and resentment could all have been avoided. I am not talking about anything in particular that is going on with me today, just lessons I have learned in the past. I have gotten better about talking about things, but even now, I am hesitant to bring something up because people are just sensitive by nature, especially when they feel like they are being attacked, or picked on. That is never my intention. Communication is the key to any happy relationship no matter who the relationship is with..parents, siblings or partners. Nothing can ever get resolved if concerns are never addressed.

I guess there are a lot of things that I could do better but one big thing is talking about things that bother me. I can never seem to avoid hurting people by talking about these things. For instance, not long ago, my kids weren't getting along because of something one of them did. I killed me to see them not talking knowing how much they love each other and how important they are to each other. Whenever I brought up the subject, feelings got hurt and anger just ran rampid. It didn't matter what I said, it was always the wrong thing. It hurt a lot and made me sad knowing that there was nothing I could do to make the situation better. They had to resolve it on their own. The wait for that to happen was unbearable. If they had just talked about the situation, rather than avoiding the issue, they would have been a lot happier a lot faster. Once the problem was addressed, it was resolved and life got back to normal. All those months of anger and hatred just do not make any sense. It was time wasted. All is good now, but what if this had gone on for years, so many memories would never have happened. I hope they have both learned from this.  

So take my advice and adopt my motto: LIFE'S TOO SHORT! GET OVER IT AND MOVE ON!
You will be glad you did :)

The Glass ~ Half EMPTY or Half FULL?

Life certainly has a way of interfering with your plans. As you know, my belief is that everything that happens in your life, happens for a reason. How you react to the things that happen is entirely up to you and will determine your attitude and outlook in life. Is your glass half empty or half full?

Is the glass half empty or half full? is a common expression to indicate that a particular situation could be a cause for optimism (half full) or pessimism (half empty). There has been a lot of things that have happened in my life to make me feel like my glass was always half empty. I quite often thought, "When would all the good stuff happen to me?"  and "Why do other people win the lottery when I am the one that needs it?" You know the kind of thoughts I mean. You have had them yourself. And everyone you know has had them.

As a rule, I am usually a pretty optimistic person. Always smiling and making conversation as if I didn't have a care in the world, like everything was fantastic. Truth is, things get me down the same as everyone else. I start to worry that I can't please everybody. Money is always tight so that means that if I want to do something nice for someone just because I want to, I can't. This bothers me. I have always been the type of person that likes to do things for other people just so they will be happy, and that their day will be just a little better for it. I like to act on my ideas and thoughts, pay it forward as you will, just because I know it would make that person feel good. I would love to send people flowers for no reason at all, buy a round of drinks for my friends when we are out, or even just say, "Here's $20, you need it more than me". Because right now I can't do that, the things I was accustomed to doing, sometimes I feel my glass has a leak. I know things will get better because I always worry too much and things always turn out fine. The important things in life I already have and always will have....my glass really is half full...

~ I have an awesome, awesome family and kids, boyfriend who loves me and takes great care of me, and Maui who keeps my glass full just by being here with those big brown eyes :)
~ I have a job that is full time with benefits and I work with two awesome ladies who always look out for me and make me feel as if I matter.
~ My health is pretty good. Although I feel a lot of aches and pains, luckily I have not ever been diagnosed with anything serious.
~Money, although it is not overly abundant, I have a boyfriend that makes sure I have everything I need. There is always food in the apartment, a roof over my head, Maui is well taken care of, and if I need money for something he always finds it. And if I do have money, then if you need it, it's yours.
~I have the most awesome friends a girl could wish for, and I would do anything for any one of them, unless that required money then we might have a problem lol.

There are so many things I could be negative about, with Christmas coming up and not knowing where money is going to come from to buy presents, food or to travel. But I am keeping in mind what I do have...a Half Full Glass...

Pay It Forward....100 RANDOM ACTS of KINDNESS

Have you ever been walking by some construction workers on a hot day and thought to yourself, "I am glad that's not me working in that heat" or walk by someone sitting at a bus stop waiting for their bus home at the end of the day and something about them catches your eye, maybe their outfit or their hair cut or even just the way they smiled at you? So many times in my life I have thought about people in their every day life, and how, even for a split moment, somethng about them has made me stop and realize that a kind word or gesture can go a long way. I am sure the construction workers would have appreciated some ice cold bottles of water and why is it that when the person at the bus stop caught my eye, I didn't go up to them and tell them they looked good? Because I, like many others, do not act on these thoughts, even though they could literally make someone's day...I am going to try to act on these thoughts more often. Will you?

Whether you realize it or not, what you say to people can have a huge impact on their day, perhaps even their life. These days, so many people have a tough life and they hide behind a colourful facade. They put on a brave face and only a trained eye can see past the make up and piercings and wild hair to reveal the true person underneath. A friend of mine once walked past a person with a colourful mohawk and piercings. She loved his hair and went up to him and told him that his hair looked absolutely awesome. Well that comment just made his day. The walls came down and for a moment, he didn't feel the generation gap between them. He started talking to her about his hair and seemed to be grinning from ear to ear. Do you think she made his day? I can guarantee you, he was probably thinking of my friend the rest of the day. There are so many ways to make an impression in someone's life, all you have to do to get started is act on it! Pay It Forward!

100 IDEAS FOR KINDNESS

1. Deliver fresh-baked cookies to city workers.
2. Collect goods for a food bank.
3. Bring flowers to work and share them with coworkers.
4. Garden clubs can make floral arrangements for senior centers, nursing homes, hospitals, police stations, or shut-ins.
5. Adopt a student who needs a friend, checking in periodically to see how things are going.
6. Volunteer to be a tutor in a school.
7. Extend a hand to someone in need. Give your full attention and simply listen.
8. Merchants can donate a percentage of receipts for the week to a special cause.
9. Bring coworkers a special treat.
10. Students can clean classrooms for the custodian.
11. Buy a stranger a free pizza.
12. Distribute lollipops to kids.
13. Sing at a nursing home.
14. Offer a couple of hours of baby-sitting to parents. 15. Slip paper hearts that say “It’s Random Acts of Kindness Week! Have a great day!” under the windshield wipers of parked cars.
16. Have a charity day at work, with employees bringing nonperishable food items to donate.
17. Serve refreshments to customers.
18. Draw names at school or work, and have people bring a small gift or food treat for their secret pal.
19. Remember the bereaved with phone calls, cards, plants, and food.
20. Treat someone to fresh fruit.
21. Pay a compliment at least once a day.
22. Call or visit a homebound person.
23. Hand out balloons to passersby.
24. Give free sodas to motorists.
25. Be a good neighbor. Take over a baked treat or stop by to say “Hello.”
26. Transport someone who can’t drive.
27. Mow a neighbor’s grass.
28. Say something nice to everyone you meet today.
29. Send a treat to a school or day-care center.
30. Volunteer at an agency that needs help.
31. Wipe rainwater off shopping carts or hold umbrellas for shoppers on the way to their cars.
32. Give the gift of your smile.
33. Send home a note telling parents something their child did well.
34. Adopt a homeless pet at the humane society.
35. Organize a scout troop or service club to help people with packages at the mall or grocery.
36. Host special programs or speakers at libraries or bookstores.
37. Offer to answer the phone for the school secretary for ten minutes.
38. Volunteer to read to students in the classroom.
39. Write notes of appreciation and bring flowers or goodies to teachers or other important people, such as the principal, nurse, custodian, and secretary.
40. Incorporate kindness into the curriculum at area schools, day care centers, or children’s classes in faith organizations.
41. Give a hug to a friend.
42. Tell your children why you love them.
43. Write a note to your mother/father and tell them why they are special.
44. Pat someone on the back.
45. Write a thank-you note to a mentor or someone who has influenced your life in a positive way.
46. Give coffee to people on their way to work in the morning.
47. Donate time at a senior center.
48. Give blood.
49. Visit hospitals with smiles, treats, and friendly conversation for patients.
50. Stop by a nursing home, and visit a resident with no family nearby.
51. Plant flowers in your neighbor’s flower box.
52. Give another driver your parking spot.
53. Leave a treat or handmade note of thanks for a delivery person or mail carrier.
54. Give free car washes.
55. Clean graffiti from neighborhood walls and buildings.
56. Tell your boss that you think he/she does a good job.
57. Tell your employees how much you appreciate their work.
58. Let your staff leave work an hour early.
59. Have a clean-up party in the park.
60. Tell a bus or taxi driver how much you appreciate their driving.
61. Have everyone in your office draw the name of a Random Acts of Kindness buddy out of a hat and do a kind act for their buddy that day or week.
62. Give a pair of tickets to a baseball game or concert to a stranger.
63. Leave an extra big tip for the waitperson.
64. Drop off a plant, cookies, or donuts to the police or fire department.
65. Open the door for another person.
66. Pay for the meal of the person behind you in the drive-through.
67. Write a note to the boss of someone who has helped you, praising the employee.
68. Leave a bouquet of flowers on the desk of a colleague at work with whom you don’t normally get along.
69. Call an estranged family member.
70. Volunteer to fix up an elderly couple’s home.
71. Pay for the person behind you in the movie line.
72. Give flowers to be delivered with meal delivery programs.
73. Give toys to the children at the shelter or safe house.
74. Give friends and family kindness coupons they can redeem for kind favors.
75. Be a friend to a new student or coworker.
76. Renew an old friendship by sending a letter or small gift to someone you haven’t talked with in a long time.
77. For one week, act on every single thought of generosity that arises spontaneously in your heart, and notice what happens as a consequence.
78. Offer to return a shopping cart to the store for someone loading a car.
79. Invite someone new over for dinner.
80. Buy a roll of brightly colored stickers and give them to children you meet during the day.
81. Write a card of thanks and leave it with your tip. Be sure to be specific in your thanks.
82. Let the person behind you in the grocery store go ahead of you in line.
83. When drivers try to merge into your lane, let them in with a wave and a smile.
84. Buy cold drinks for the people next to you at a ball game.
85. Distribute kindness bookmarks that you have made.
86. Create a craft project or build a bird house with a child.
87. Give a bag of groceries to a homeless person.
88. Laugh out loud often and share your smile generously.
89. Plant a tree in your neighborhood.
90. Make a list of things to do to bring more kindness into the world, and have a friend make a list. Exchange lists and do one item per day for a month.
91. Use an instant camera to take people’s photographs at a party or community event, and give the picture to them.
92. As you go about your day, pick up trash.
93. Send a letter to some former teachers, letting them know the difference they made in your life.
94. Send a gift anonymously to a friend.
95. Organize a clothing drive for a shelter.
96. Buy books for a day care or school.
97. Slip a $20 bill to a person who you know is having financial difficulty.
98. Take an acquaintance to dinner.
99. Offer to take a friend’s child to ball practice.
100. Waive late fees for the week. Bring flowers to work and share them with coworkers.

I would love to hear your comments about how you impacted someone's life by doing a random act of kindness or how you merely Paid it Forward :)

Curved Paths

I think it's interesting that we have a preconceived idea of what our future holds. I have had so many wrong turns in my life that I would never have dreamt that I would be where I am today. Wrong turns? I don't think so...just new directions...guided by someone for some special reason. I think the directions we take, whether planned or not, have a reason for being part of our journeys. There are lessons that we learn along those paths that pave the way for future events. And if they aren't lessons for us, then they are lessons meant for others as a result of our directions we choose....

About a year and a half ago, I lost my job. It was devastating to me. Yet my belief was that everything happens for a reason. Although I could not fathom why I should have lost my job I knew there must be a reason even though I could not see it.So, I lost my job in April, had to vacate the condo I shared with my kids, and  had to start over...but where? Well I was planning on moving to Chatham when my lease was up in November of last year so that I could be closer to Darren, but this sudden turn of events really threw a wrench  in my plans. All of a sudden, I had to find a new place to live with no job and no money. And it also threw my kids' lives into a turmoil. If something affects one of us, it affects all of us. So the day I lost my job, I drove to Chatham to talk to Darren, being very upset I knew he was the only person I wanted to talk to. He made me feel a lot better and offered me to stay at his apartment until I get settled with a new job and secure a place to live. Good, I have support and an amazing person to help me get through this. But because of the path that my life had taken, my kids' lives had changed as well.

Now, life certainly does throw us some curve balls. But it is how we catch those curve balls and throw them back that makes the difference.For some, that adaptation is quite easy and the challenge is like an every day occurance. They have no problems with the curve balls. But  for others it is very difficult. Some people have a hard time adapting to changes and if there is to be a change in their life, then they want to be the ones making it. But change is necessary for growth. It is important for people to grow even if that growth was out of their control. I think the change in my life with losing my job and moving to Chatham, has definitely made an impact on my children's lives for the better. They have grown as adults and have had to make uncomfortable decisions that determine their own path in life. Curved paths or not, they all happen for a reason. I know there was a reason for mine :)

The Lucky One

The Lucky One...that's me. As I have travelled through life, I have realised just how lucky I am. For starters, I am lucky to have the family that I was blessed with.

Starting with my parents, my dad was the best. He has always put family first and at times, has worked 3 jobs just to support us. He has taught all of us the importance of sticking together and being there for one another. He was always the strong silent type and although he didn't always voice his opinion, you always knew he had one. He has set the best example for all of us to follow and I can proudly say we still all stick together and put each other first. He has been gone for over 12 years now, but I hear him and feel him every day. He is still here for me and I feel him around me all the time. He is truly missed.

My mom has always been the root of the family. The one that we all still look up to for advice no matter what our age..no matter what her age. She has been there for us and helped all of us kids through difficult times. Never complaining about her own situations, she still puts us first. Even though we are all grown with children of our own, her first concern is her children and grandchildren. She still has to make sure everyone is happy and ok. Being a mother myself, I believe I have followed in her footsteps and I wouldn't have it any other way. I am proud to say that I am just like my mother and that's quite an accomplishment. She is now in a nursing home. We all go visit her but somehow it just isn't the same when you are not in your own home. Home is what you make it..words to live by...

Brothers and Sisters...Dan, Sharon, Mitch and Terry...I love each and every one of them immensely. I would be lost without any one of them. I have been so lucky to have them growing up. They have made me the person I am today and I think I turned out pretty good. I can only hope that I have been able to pass on to my kids, the right things, the same things I have been taught...to always put each other first, to always be there for each other and to always love each other unconditionally. No matter what things get thrown at them and no matter what the other does, they are there for them, no questions asked.

My Kids...Kelsie and Rob (aka BB and Billy Bob)...geez, not sure where to begin here. I won the lottery when I was blessed with these two kids. I am so proud of each one of them. They both have their own strengths and accomplishments which make them unique. They say you never know unconditional love until you have children but I do think I learned that from my parents and siblings. Having kids just reinforced that love. I know they love each other a lot although it seems they like to go through life pretending they don't. Through thick and thin I know when it comes right down to it, they will always have each other. If they can both treat each other with love and respect, I would be happy. Somehow everything else always works out.

D...so glad I have him in my life. He really has been my rock since I have met him. He has gotten me through a tough couple of years. His sense of humour has always been his greatest asset to me. At the end of a bad day you have someone that can make you laugh, you hold onto that person. He treats me with respect and wants nothing more than t make me happy. I can talk to him about absolutely anything and he is not judgemental. He is a good listener and doesn't just tell me what I want to hear..he tells me what I need to hear. He is, and always will be there for me no matter what. I can trust him, end of story. He's a keeper :)

Maui...man, what did I do to deserve her? She has been an indispensable addition to my life. It's like she just "knows" when something is wrong or if someone is hurting. She is right beside you to make you feel better, physically or emotionally. You can have the worse day possible and you just have to look at those big brown eyes and you instantly forget about all the bad stuff. Maui Therapy..I wish I could bottle it!

Friends...perhaps should have been mentioned before the end but equally as important as family. Too many to mention but of course there are the best of the best who have always stood by me through the years. Tammy, who I have known since the first man walked on the moon, yes..1969..she's always had my back. Karen, 19 years of putting up with me. And Beckie, 18 or 19 years as well. I know I can pick up the phone and talk to any of my friends and it would be like I just talked to them yesterday. I would truly be lost without any one of them..

Family, friends, boyfriend, and dog...I have the best ones of all...I really am the lucky one <3